Siem Reap...Land of the Temples

Didn't I say I was "templed" out before hitting Siem Reap? Oh yes I did, but if you're going to see any temples...you should definitely see the Angkor group of temples...the most famous being Angkor Wat (first 3 pictures). I am pleased to show you some pretty cool temple shots. I hope you agree.

One piece of advice...if you do come to Siem Reap, Cambodia...two days of temple touring is definitely enough!!



I think Angkor Thom was my favourite because of all the faces carved into the towers. I was told that in ancient Cambodia, the number nine was a very powerful number. It is for that reason the king had 54 towers (yes, Zwart...5+4=9) built in the temple with four faces on each tower (54*4=216...2+1+6=9). OK...I thought it was cool.

If the last picture looks familiar at all it's because the movie "Lara Croft...Tomb Raider" was filmed here at Ta Prom temple. This shot was pretty cool but the temple itself has pretty much crumbled to the ground due to tree roots breaking through the walls. Don't mess with Mother Nature! I'm also going to talk to my agent as I expected Angelina to be my tour guide at this temple.

A couple of cool things I did while in Siem Reap included having lunch at the Grand Hotel which is the oldest hotel in the city and also the most luxurious I was told. The Embro Boy was hanging with the elite. He wasn't there at the time, but it's my understanding this is where George Bush stayed as well as many kings and celebrities such as my girlfriend, Angelina Jolie. I held my own!!

I also went to see some Apsara dancing. I really don't know how to explain it, but it was a group of mostly very attractive girls (good start!) in colourful costumes doing very weird things with their hands. OK guys...get your minds out of the gutter...this was a family show. It's just that they can curl their fingers backwards and it's pretty freaky.

And how ironic...after bathing in polluted water and eating bugs...it was at this 4-5 star entertainment restaurant where I got food poisoning. I was nasty sick for a couple of days. Nothing like meeting new people at the show and going out for a couple of drinks...and then finding yourself violently throwing up in the bathroom an hour later. I had to make a hasty exit. I don't think they'll be keeping in touch!

After Siem Reap...I found myself back in Bangkok for a few days. It was nice to see a familiar face as Silvia (who I met in NZ) was in Bangkok as well so we decided to hook up and travel south together. However, those few days in Bangkok found us in the middle of the Songkran festival (Thai New Year and Water Festival). Basically, this meant I got wet!! It has become a tradition for everyone to throw water at each other (it's meant as a gesture for good luck) and to also cover each other with a "baby powder" like substance.

Now when I said I got wet...picture having a BUCKET of water or hose turned on you every 50ft. Luckily, most of the water was warm because it's damn hot in Bangkok, but some of the revellers liked to put blocks of ice in the water to give a more dramatic effect. It was pretty crazy on the streets of Bangkok. However, I was impressed with one group. After they took turns dumping water on me (about 6 of them)...they waved me back off the street and handed me a glass of whiskey. I drank it to uphold international relations. I think they were impressed when I "shot" it down.

I currently find myself on Phuket Island. Not a bad place to be. Unfortunately, it's pretty tame here right now as off season starts in another week. However, some R&R has been good for me. And Aunt Joanne should be happy to know that my drinking has been dramatically curtailed here in Thailand. (I was told she was a little concerned) I like to think it's just the lull before the storm.

I'm off to Europe in less than 5 days and look forward to partying with all my new friends I've met in my travels so far. I'm almost afraid to visit Ireland and England. I hope my liver is taking advantage of this down time...it's got some work to do in the near future.

Signing off from South East Asia! I hope you enjoyed the pictures. It was definitely a culture I've never experienced before. And please...no more temples for awhile!

"Sawasdee!!"

Phnom Penh...Cambodia

Just when I didn't think traffic could get any worse...I arrived in Phnom Penh. Now I'm sure you're getting tired about me talking about traffic, but it's nothing like I've ever seen before.


Once again...motorbikes dominate the road...and for my good friend Smiley...you'll be happing to know that every second car in Cambodia is a Toyota Camry.



But just think about a city with approx 1.7M people living in it and most of the intersections don't have traffic lights or stop signs. I never observed a rule of thumb such as "four way stop" mentality...it was more about the bigger your vehicle...the less you have to slow down.

And just to give you an idea of how crazy it was...I either witnessed live for myself or saw the aftermath of three accidents on the way to the airport. OK...enough about damn traffic...we all have busy lives.


Like Thailand...Cambodia is dotted with temples everywhere. I was told there are more than 2000 temples in Cambodia. I think I've seen most of them now. The other thing Cambodia has a lot of is landmines. I was told they estimate that there are over 6M undetonated land mines covering the countryside. Very scary!

And it's heart wrenching to walk past the hundreds of beggars who obviously lost limbs due to landmines.



The shrine above is dedicated to the woman who found a Buddha relic at the site of which has become Phnom Penh. I think you can write your own ticket if you find a Buddha relic. Unfortunately, I'm not too sure what to look for.



The site of the birthplace of Phnom Penh has monkeys running all over the place. Hey...maybe I'm not too far from home afterall...it's like our Parliament. Just kidding...I don't know enough about politics to start having those discssions on my blog. Let's move on to religion or sex instead.



However, my guide informed me that I was very lucky to have the monkey come so close to me and get a shot of him. My understanding is that this particular monkey often attacks tourists if they look at him or take his picture. I did quickly look the other way a few times before I got the shot. Man...once again...putting my life on the line for you readers. I was only about 12 ft from him and I had forgotten to wear my kevlar body suit. You guys owe me!

Now I mentioned my guide...did I also mention that I had a personal driver as well. I'm a somebody in Cambodia. In both Phnom Penh and Siem Reap (next blog), I had a personal guide and a personal driver. Oh yeah...you might see me on the next issue of Cambodia's GQ, or People Magazine, or The National Enquirer...or more likely....Mad Magazine's "Look at the Western Boy Sweat" article. It was HOT!

As I already mentioned, Cambodia is known for it's landmines, but it's also known for the genocide that happened in the mid to late 1970s. More than 2M people were massacred in just under 4 years. And most of those massacred were under the age of 8, over the age of 40 and anyone with experience or education. From the stories I read and the stories I heard...the Khmer Rouge were ruthless executioners.

I did visit the genocide museum (an ex jail and interrogation centre) as well as the killing fields just outside Phnom Penh where more than 8000 skulls have been found in mass graves. It was a very sobering experience. I've decided to only show two of my pictures taken from the genocide museum and none from the killing fields. (see below)

Now whether or not the gentleman below was the "real" deal...it was a nice story to want to believe after seeing the genocide museum. This gentlemen claimed to be one of the men in the picture he was pointing to and one of less than 20 people to have survived the jail. Both my guide and I believe it was him. He had some very disturbing stories to tell us and showed us some very disturbing wounds he still had.

This gentlemen never asked us for anything and told us that he was participating in the war criminal tribunals. I feel fortunate to have met him (if he was indeed who he said he was) and hope he can help bring some closure to all the families that were affected by these atrocities.

On to Siem Reap where the sights are less disturbing.

Chiang Mia...

Chiang Mia was a welcomed sight after spending a few days in Bangkok(see posting below). It was much smaller (1.6M people), much cleaner and traffic was only crazy...not chaotic. I must admit though...it didn't smell that much better than Bangkok due to the fact the inner city is surrounded by a moat/canal filled with some pretty dicey water.



I had the first afternoon to kill before my 4 day trek the next day so I hopped on a 1/2 day excursion to Doi Suthep (temple in the hills...over 600 years old) and a village in the hills. You can never get enough Buddha temple shots...so here's another. Actually...I'm almost "templed" out.


As I soon learned...the people living in the hills often wore traditional clothes, even when I was the only foreigner around. Now I think the outfits worn by these two girls (before I started my trek) were more for the tourists than anything, but you'll see that others are clad in bright colours as well. I didn't have the fortune to visit the "long neck" village, but my understanding was that it was fairly close by. You might have seen the women who wear bands around their neck to give them the appearance of an extended neck. I found out that the jewellry is really just crushing their collar bone and vertebrae...not actually extending their necks...Who knew?? Bizarre!!

Now I know I bragged about my accomodations in Thailand in earler posts, but Chiang Mia was no different. It is hard to call yourself a backpacker when living in opulant (I know Tim likes when I use these big words) surroundings to the left. Why show you a hotel room...it's so that you can see the contrast I had in accomodations over a 12 hour period of time. Let's just say I didn't find myself needing to use the washroom very often during my 4 day trek and bamboo is hard to sleep on...trust me!

The trek started with a 4 hour drive north from Chiang Mia and into what I thought was the middle of nowhere. However, I felt pretty special as it was only the guide and myself for the next 4 days. I soon found out that meant more work for me and I was the only target for the villagers to sell their wares to. Talk about a hard sell!!

Just before the driver left us to begin our trek he offered me a bag of dead grasshoppers. What the heck did I need them for on my trek? He smiled and proceeded to grab a handful and eat them. What's a guy to do...so I grabbed three grasshoppers (and where was the chocolate...that would have made them more appealing) and down the hatch they went. The driver nodded his approval and poured another 30-40 into my hands and smiled. So...the trek began with me eating more than 30 grasshoppers. At that moment, I was a bit concerned what else was in store for me.

The hike to the first hill village was only about 4kms, but even though I really wouldn't call it a jungle (my guide did inform me that there were cobras, pythons, scorpions, wild boars, feral buffalos, spiders and lots more creepy stuff around)...the woods were pretty dense and I never really saw any path to follow. And in case you're wondering...hill villages really mean they are found in the hills so there was a lot of up and down to get there. It was also "jungle" hot outside...and the bush fires that the villagers set didn't help the situation either(since we walked within 10 feet of numerous fires along the way). I asked my guide if the fires ever got out of hand and he said..."only sometimes". That answer wasn't too reassuring for me. The noise in the woods also surpised me as the cicada bugs can be deafening and a real pain in the butt (literally) when they hit you. But I became master of them when I ate boiled cicada bugs at the first village. What was I turning into...insect carnivore?

When we arrived at the village, I was dumbfounded and thought I was looking at a movie set. I didn't realize people still lived this way. Small bamboo huts were surrounded by chickens, pigs, dogs, cats, cows and buffalos. Most of this village did have electricity, but not all the villages we visited did. And it gets dark early in the middle of nowhere. It was usually pitch black...except for the candlelight by 7:30 every night. Candlelight might be romantic in some circumstances, but this wasn't one of them.

One of the great things about being the sole trekker with the guide... usually one of the families invited us to eat dinner with them. The worst part about being the lone trekker is that you feel compelled to buy a trinket from everyone as it is one of their main money earning opportunities for their families.

Every meal was cooked over an open fire and rice is a staple for breakfast, lunch and dinner. I've definitely had enough sticky rice for awhile. I always felt a bit ashamed as I could never eat everything my guide prepared for me...knowing that the villagers often only ate rice...but they always seemed happy to eat my leftovers. It certainly gives you a new perspective on things.

The second day was our longest day as we trekked for 13kms to the next village. Up and down...up and down!!! The guide explained many different insects, plants and trees to me along the way and I sampled everything he gave me to eat. I'm not sure that was the smartest thing to do, but I was feeling one with nature.

Since I hadn't washed that morning (did you see the bathroom picture??) I was feeling pretty grubby by the time we arrived at the next village. My guide told me there was a nice river to wash in when we got there. I know what you're saying..."don't do it Joe" But feeling dirty won over my instinct of not catching a waterborne disease and I followed the guide into the river. I wasn't the only one bathing in the river so I wasn't feeling to bad until a water buffalo crossed the river about 15 feet behind me. I knew at that instant...bathing in the river was a bad idea. That night I had nightmares about what was already growing inside me.

As you all know and it's been said in the blog already...I'm not the smartest guy...but I'm a guy who does believe in fair play. So what did I do the next morning...I gave all those tapeworms and tropical diseases a fighting chance and went back into the river for another cleansing. And didn't I see on National Geographic that most "critters" enter the body through an open wound...and what did I have on my ankle...oh yeah...and open wound. Maybe I don't have to watch what I eat now and Mr. Tapeworm will keep me thin. Bring on the beer and chips...oh...don't forget my McDonalds!!

The third morning we hiked about 6kms to an elephant camp. These 6kms were the hardest of the trek as 5.5km were up a very steep incline. I actually outpaced my guide for the most part...but he did have an heavier backpack than I did and a couple years older...but I felt good none the less. When we arrived at the elephant camp I was surpised to see the elephants were just walking around, checking everyone out. These animals are pretty daunting when they walk up to you and give you a sniff. Sorry Vern (my friend the elephant keeper at Toronto zoo)...I did go for an elephant ride. The picture of the elephant above was the one I rode on. I was very impressed how nimble these huge animals are going around rocks, up and down hills, through the water etc...but the ride sure wasn't smooth. You had to hold on to the seat for dear life or down you would go. I made sure I bought him extra bananas when we were done.

The afternoon of the third day had us building a bamboo raft that we were going to use to raft down the river. The raft consisted of 10 bamboo "logs" lengthwise and 5 bamboo "logs" cross tied to keep them in place. Not the sturdiest thing I ever seen. My first experience of using a bamboo pole to propel this little makeshift raft along the river was pretty rewarding. The next day I wasn't so cocky! Along the river we passed a herd of water buffalo cooling off in the river and literally...scared the crap out of them. I could feel the diseases working their way through me at that instant.

But oh yeah...you guessed it...I found myself in the river again later that day. Disgusting!!! I am not right!! My trek had me eating unrefridgerated meat, my food served on dishes rinsed by well water and bugs landing on my food every few minutes...what doesn't kill you makes you stronger. We'll see if that holds true over the next few weeks!

At the village it was strange to be in the presence of only women. With the earlier tribes...it was usually the men who hosted us. I found out that in most tribes, the men have more time on their hands as it usually falls to the women to work in the fields. I liked the thought that for 20,000 or 30,000 Baht (about $700- $1000 Cdn) I could buy a wife and that she was expected to do all the work. Not a bad system. However, as I was reminded at every village...I was too old to marry (story of my life). Most hill village people get married before the age of 20 and start having kids right away. However, in the last village...an 18yr old man had just recently married a 55yr old woman. I'm not sure what that's all about. I guess there is still hope for me yet. Our last night was very strange indeed...the women of this hill tribe were very interested in knowing more about life in Canada (not so strange)...but the topic soon turned to sex. Hey...they brought it up first. I soon learned that the hill tribe usually only have sex when they want to have another child and never get completely naked for the act. I think I like our culture better!!

The last morning had us rafting for about two hours to the last village we would visit. It turns out this village is where my guide was born and spent most of his life.

We had to traverse many rapids along the river and even though I never fell off the raft...I was thrown to one knee once....OK...twice, but I never said I was a professional bamboo white water rafter!!

This last picture had me smiling with my guide, Nong...happy to have survived (so far anyway) the 4 day trek and looking forward to a real shower.

One night in Bangkok...

And my first foray into Bangkok WAS only one night. I flew from Auckland NZ, to Sydney Aus, to Bangkok Thailand and arrived at 2:00am to see the smiling faces of Miranda and Livio in the hotel lobby. Please see the lovely picture to your left. Yes, Miranda is HOT...Livio...I'll let you girls decide. We spent the next day sight seeing before we hit the airport later that same day to fly to Krabi.



As most of you guys know...Bangkok is well known for it's beautiful women, thai boxing and ping pong demonstrations. Fortunately or unfortunately...I didn't get myself involved in any of the above. I'll think I'll keep in that way for my last week in Thailand as well.

Gus would be so disappointed. He is the master when it comes to Thailand. I think I would have felt better with a drinking partner. I sense being drunk and alone in Bangkok is a BAD idea. And from what I've seen and heard...it's not that easy to pick out the "lady boys". Now that scares me!! I saw the movie...The Crying Game...that was enough. I wouldn't want to live through it and then have to kill some one and spend my life in a Thai prison. No thanks!!



However, we did manage to jam a lot into that first day. We crammed ourselves into the skytrain...and I mean crammed. I think sardines in a can have more room to move. We hired a private long boat and cruised the river heading for the largest temple and Grand Palace. Unfortunately, the temple was holding a private ceremony so off we went to the Grand Palace. I had to "rent" long pants as you can't wear shorts into the palace or even into any sacred places I would soon learn. Nothing like wearing polyester pants when it's high 30's outside. The only good thing about those pants...I think I've sweated all the beer I consumed in NZ out of my body now.


Here was my first look into an ancient culture. Everything was larger than life and ornate (I mean really ORNATE) up the "whazoo". Most of my pictures barely catch a glimpse of the size of the temples, statues, sculptures, paintings decorations, etc. It was all very overwhelming and all soooo different from anything I've ever seen before. I found it almost impossible to comprehend that the sights I was looking at dated back to between the 9th and 15th century.

However, I guess if I put it in perspective of when the Leafs last won the cup...it's about the same timeframe. Go Wings Go!! However...there are sooooo many temples that you soon get used to them and then it's like...another ancient masterpiece..."nice I guess, but I've seen nicer" It really is a shame as they are all awe inspiring.

The Thai people are extremely friendly, very spiritual (most are strict Buddhists), love their king very much and take their history very seriously...so if you ever come over here...Bangkok can be a pretty crazy city, but you must respect their heritage or find yourself in a lot of trouble. Believe it or not...I was on my best behaviour! I loved seeing all the monks in their orange robes (no chance of me becoming one...don't worry), but always felt bad to take a picture of them...so any picture of a monk was done by stealth.

Upon entering Bangkok...the first thing you realize is...it's big, busy and in my mind...a fairly dirty city. People are hustling (trying to sell you anything and everything...ALL the time) and bustling everywhere...as are scooters and motorbikes (at any time you could see 20-30 of them waiting at a stop light. Many pedestrians and motorcyclists wear masks to stop the odor, dust and pollution. For those of you who are daring...I suggest giving a go with Thai traffic. Everyone is weaving in and out, scooters/motorbikes going the wrong way and pedestrians trying to live another day. Crazy!!

I spent two days by myself in Bangkok after Koh Lanta and what did I do...of course...I went to see more temples, palaces and things older than I can comprehend. I think that's what you're supposed to do when your here. However, I believe there is MUCH MUCH more to Bangkok than I seen to date...so don't let me give you a false impression. I think Bangkok is a very different city when the sun goes down. I also think it's for the daring or the crazy. You decide if you fit the mold. I'm still testing the waters.

The one thing Bangkok does have is shopping. You girls out there would love it. The MBK centre and the high end malls are HUGE and you can buy anything you can think of.

And lastly...I took this picture of these Buddha sculptures in various postions (meditation, calming the seas, telling your family not to fight one another and so on...) because I felt "one" with the Buddha since I knew 7 of his positions. I would soon learn that there are close to 80 different Buddha positions. I guess Buddha and I aren't that close yet. I'll keep working on it.

More Buddha...

To Beautiful Thailand...

Welcome to Thailand.

I hope you enjoy the next few postings of Thailand as much as I enjoyed experiencing them. OK...maybe that's not possible, but I hope you like the postings anyway.

Even though I started my Thailand experience in Bangkok, I figured the pictures of Koh Lanta island may have more impact on you when you still have memories of lots of snow. Bangkok will follow later.

So how did I prepare myself for travel to this foreign land with a culture very different to my own...easy! I found a hot Swiss girl in NZ who was travelling to Thailand at the same time as I was and I just followed her. I wouldn't recommend this approach for everyone, but it worked for me...at least for my first week.

You're the best Miranda!



A friend of Miranda's...Livio...flew in from Switzerland so the three of us set sail for paradise. And paradise it was. All the pictures you are seeing were taken by me on Koh Lanta island...but using Miranda's camera. I think you'll agree the results aren't too shabby.





Unfortunately, our bungalows weren't right on the beach...we are backpackers you know. Alas... we were forced to walk about 30-60 seconds before we hit the water. And although all these pictures were taken at night...I can tell you that the water was dazzling blue in colour. I shouldn't bore you with my hardships...but it is my blog...so here goes...I almost found the water too warm to be refreshing. I thought about asking for a refund. I guess you get what you pay for...it did cost $22 a night!! Good thing breakfast was included.

Our days usually consisted of breakfast at the beach restaurant followed by swimming and laying on the beach for a couple of hours and then relaxing in a covered hut as we sipped refreshments and ate some excellent Thai food for the remainder of the afternoon with the odd swim thrown in for good measure. I did say this was paradise.

Now this is one of my favourite pictures...not only because I took it, but because of the location it was taken from. This vantage point was basically what we gazed upon as we enjoyed our massages. I am now a big fan of Thai massages and would recommend them to anyone. Just be ready for elbows, knees, feet and very strong hands pulling and tugging at you in every direction.

If that picture doesn't do it for you...let me paint a mental picture for you as I believe everyone deserves a little paradise. @#$%$#% My paradise just went to hell as I just deleted a pretty cool picture. Sorry about that. Ok...enough about me...back to you...

Picture yourself laying down on a soft mattress slightly elevated off the sand of a beautiful beach. There are very few people around so you feel you have the beach to yourself. The warm evening breaze is gently moving the seashell windchime above your head like percussion to the beat of the waves as they lap up onto the shoreline. As you rest your chin on the pillow all your eyes can behold are the multitude of brillant colours of a sunset beyond imagination. Warm towels are then placed on your legs and back so that you don't catch a chill as strong hands begin their hour long dance on your completely relaxed body. Get the picture??

If that sounds good...go for the oil massage...the Thai massage has a little more pain involved!

Can I send that paragraph to my grade 10/11 English teacher? Ms Santaloupo (spelling?) wouldn't believe I wrote it. Sorry dudes...I'll try to trash up my next posting.

But all good things must come to an end...Miranda had to head back to Switzerland; Livio went on to meet with another friend...and I was in Bangkok by myself.

It was the first time in more than a month I found myself alone. The question is...would I survive? It's OK Tim...the question was rhetorical as I'm writing this posting...so I must be alive.

Next... a little about Bangkok...which is a far different place from Koh Lanta. I hope you enjoyed a little paradise. I sure did!!